


a flame that never dies

by starlightwalking



Series: the wondrous parts of you and I [8]
Category: The Silmarillion and other histories of Middle-Earth - J. R. R. Tolkien
Genre: Beleriand, Candles, Family Fluff, Gen, Gil-galad Russingonion, Gil-galad Son of Plothole, Kid Fic, M/M, TSS Advent Treat, Tolkien Secret Santa 2020 Advent Calendar, Tooth-Rotting Fluff, Traditions, Winter Solstice
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-13
Updated: 2020-12-13
Packaged: 2021-03-11 01:28:59
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 804
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28056906
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/starlightwalking/pseuds/starlightwalking
Summary: Findekáno and Russandol share a family tradition with their son.
Relationships: Ereinion Gil-galad & Fingon | Findekáno, Ereinion Gil-galad & Fingon | Findekáno & Maedhros | Maitimo, Ereinion Gil-galad & Maedhros | Maitimo, Fingon | Findekáno/Maedhros | Maitimo
Series: the wondrous parts of you and I [8]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1979144
Comments: 30
Kudos: 57
Collections: Tolkien Secret Santa 2020 ADVENT CALENDAR





	a flame that never dies

**Author's Note:**

> A treat for day 13 of the Tolkien Secret Santa Advent Calendar. This is for the gen prompt "Candlelight."
> 
> This is part of my larger trans!Finno verse, but can be read independently :)
> 
> Gil is about 3 or 4 here.
> 
> title from the Les Mis "Finale"

Russandol hadn’t let Gil-galad play outside in the snow very long—for all he himself had to be coaxed and coerced into wearing scarves and gloves even in the dead of Himring’s dreadful winters, he was overly concerned with their tiny son’s exposure to the cold. Findekáno, who preferred to stay inside in weather like this, was grateful for his husband’s care with the baby, but the way Gil pouted as his atya ushered him back to the warmth of the hearth after only ten scant minutes of laughing at snowflakes tugged at Findekáno’s heartstrings.

“Atto,” Gil whined, snuggling into his father’s lap. “Play? Outside?” As an afterthought, he added, “Please?”

Findekáno kissed his nose. “Tomorrow, maybe,” he said. He was yet unfond of anything that reminded him of the Helcaraxë, but for Gil-galad he would endure the cold.

“It’s Long Night,” Russandol said, ruffling Gil’s hair. “Do you think you’re big enough to light the candles this year?”

Gil squirmed out of Findekáno’s lap. “Yes, yes!” he squealed. “Pleeease, Atya? Pleeeeease?”

“What does Atto say?” Russo asked, smiling in the soft way he reserved just for their little family.

Gil turned his pleading eyes to his other father. Findekáno made a show of considering—and he _was_ a little nervous that Gil might burn himself—but he could deny his son nothing.

“Alright,” he agreed, getting up to add another log to the fire. “As long as you do exactly as Atya says.”

“Yay!” Gil-galad clapped his chubby little hands together, scrambling over to where the candlesticks sat by the window.

Russo chuckled, leaning down to give Findekáno a brief kiss. “We’ll be careful,” he promised.

Findekáno’s eyes misted with joyful tears as he watched his husband crouch down next to their son. He was so big, which Findekáno appreciated in a number of ways, but despite his size and the frightening scars that marred his beauty, he was very gentle with Gil-galad. Russo lit the first candle in the hearth, then carefully guided Gil in lighting the others. His large hands hovered protectively around Gil’s small ones, and he murmured soft praises as each new flame sputtered to life.

“Well done, yonya,” Russandol praised, kissing him on the forehead. He turned and smiled to Findekáno, and Finno’s heart all but melted with the love he held for them both. “Would Atto like to put the candelabra on the windowsill?”

“Of course, melda,” Findekáno agreed, rising once more from his pile of blankets and lifting the candles up to the ledge beside the glass pane. “Gil, do you know why we light the candles on Long Night?” he inquired.

“Yes!” Gil exclaimed. “To keep away the Dark!”

“That’s right,” Russandol agreed. “Atto and I were born in a place where there was always light...until one day there wasn’t anymore.”

Findekáno shivered, feeling the cold seep back into his bones. The Darkening had been frightful, the most terrifying thing he’d ever experienced; the memory still scared him. It was only the Kinslaying and the Ice and battle and Russo’s rescue and all the other horrors of exile that overshadowed that dark time.

“But we lit candles in the darkness,” Russandol continued softly, reaching out to squeeze Findekáno’s hand. “And Atto found me with his light, and I wasn’t scared any longer, not while he was with me.”

“Aww,” Gil said, beaming up at his fathers. “That’s when you got married?”

Findekáno flushed. “Ah,” he mumbled, “well, yes, technically—”

“Atto’s fëa was the light that saved me, not the candle,” Russandol murmured. “And though that was not the end of darkness and fear, I knew at least that I would always have his spirit to light my way.”

“Oh, Russo,” Findekáno sighed, leaning over Gil-galad to kiss his husband. “You are my light, too.”

“Me?” Gil asked hopefully, and his fathers laughed and bent down to pepper him with kisses until he squirmed away.

“You are our little star,” Findekáno said. “You are a light made of our fëar, and no cold wind could blow that out. Your flame will light our hearts always.” He drew Gil close, holding him, treasuring him. This moment, this night, this tradition he and Russo held—it was so much better with their son.

“The candlelight is just a reminder of that,” Russo said, coming to wrap his arms around Findekáno. Finno sighed happily, leaning back into his husband’s embrace. “A defiance against the long dark of winter, the evil of the Enemy...” A note of iron crept into his voice, and Finno reached out to caress his fëa gently—and felt little Gil reach out and do the same in his own clumsy fashion.

“But the real light is here, with us,” Russo rasped, responding in kind, reassuring them. “With you. With my family. With my love.”

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading, and please comment if you enjoyed!  
> You can find me on tumblr [@arofili](https://arofili.tumblr.com/), and check out the TSS blog [here](https://officialtolkiensecretsanta.tumblr.com/).


End file.
